What Romance Scams Are and How to Protect Yourself

Romance Scams

It’s finally happening! You met the person of your dreams online. They’re smart, they laugh at your jokes, and overall, they’re everything you’ve been looking for. Despite the excitement and mutual feelings, you’ve never met them in person. Maybe they live in a different state, or are dealing with a family emergency, but it’s always something; and recently, they’ve started asking you for money. What’s going on? Well, you might be the victim of a romance scam.

As part of International Fraud Awareness Week, we’re going to dive into romance scams: what they are, how to spot them, and how to protect yourself.

What is a Romance Scam?

If you’re in an online relationship that sounds too good to be true, it might be. Romance scams are a common fraud technique wherein scammers use fake online profiles to foster intimate online relationships and solicit funds from unsuspecting victims. They may spend weeks, months, or even years building your trust. Whether it’s because they live out of town, have medical issues or a wide array of other excuses, these fraudsters avoid meeting in person.

Typically, fraudsters meet their victims online and form the semblance of an intimate connection, flooding their victims with constant signs of affection and a steady flow of compliments. They often use these strong feelings to justify quickly advancing the relationship, even if their victims aren’t comfortable with it.

Once they’ve broken down boundaries and gained trust, scammers will start asking for large sums of money. They’ll likely say they need funds for travel, business expenses, family or other emergencies. These requests will be continuous and become more frequent as you begin to comply.

Because romance scammers want money as quickly and securely as possible, they have specific preferred methods of payment. Typically, they’ll request payments through wiring, gift cards, money transfer apps, or transfer cryptocurrency, with bank wires and cryptocurrency accounting for 60% of reported losses to romance scams in 2022.

Impact and Aftermath

Those who fall victim to romance scams may experience a multitude of negative consequences. On an emotional level, many victims not only feel that they’ve lost someone that they loved, but they also wrestle with feelings of shame and embarrassment having fallen for a fraudster. It’s important to remember that the victim is not to blame and shouldn’t feel ashamed of the criminal activity.

Aside from emotional damage, the financial consequences could set victims back years--often destroying savings, financial goals, and family relationships.

To quantify the magnitude of romance scams in recent years, in 2023, there were 64,003 reported cases of romance scams. This resulted in over $1 billion net loss, with the median loss being $2,000 per person.

How to Protect Yourself

With the increase of relationships formed online, the risk of falling victim to a romance scammer is also growing. In 2023, there was a 22% increase in reported romance scams. Always be cautious when forming relationships online and never send money to someone you haven’t met in real life, no matter how long you’ve been in contact.

Fraudsters may attempt to isolate you from friends or family. Be wary of isolation tactics like trying to turn you against those in your support network. The more isolated you are, the easier it is for fraudsters to take advantage of you.

Most importantly, if you think you’ve been affected by a romance scam, act fast to mitigate damage. The first step is to cease communication with the scammer immediately. Report the suspected scam to your bank or financial institution and ask them to stop any of these transactions. Lastly, be sure to report the scam to Reportfraud.ftc.gov and the platform where you and the romance scammer first corresponded.